Sooo...I've discovered something. I love going to the gym. I love sitting down at the machines, working muscles that I wasn't even aware that I had. And when it gets so hard that I don't think I can do one more rep? I do two, and I feel amazing for going past my limit. The end of a workout, when I am sweaty and disgusting, lets me know that I made progress that day, and I look forward to doing it again the next session. I push myself farther than I ever thought I could. And my trainer is amazing. Even if I am discouraged with myself, he makes sure I know that he's proud of what I accomplished. There's no way I could stay this motivated if he wasn't around to remind me what I'm in it for.
That being said, did you know? The more calories you burn, the more hungry you get. I've heard of it, but dang! I had no clue what a clawing, ravenous monster the new hunger was going to be. All I can think of is food lately. I dream of it, look forward to the next socially acceptable meal time, and I get frustrated when I can't have it all. And that's a problem, because if I can't control my eating, it won't matter how many miles I log on a treadmill, I won't make progress on a scale. So there is still work to be done.
I face challenges, and I knew going in to this that it wasn't going to be easy. I WILL keep working at it, I WILL keep moving forward, one pound at a time. I've noticed that, even when I'm not at the gym, I feel stronger, more confident, and way more open about my thoughts on my journey. I know a lot of people that have gone the surgery route, and the TLC shows on My (whatever the number may be) Pound Life make it look both super hard, yet crazy easy to take off the weight, but I have to do what works for me. I don't discredit the work people do that go that route, but for me it isn't an option, so I can't expect to lose 30 to 50 pounds a month. But we will see what happens as we go.
Much love, sweat, and calories burned to everyone on this journey, too! May the treadmill and protein shakes be with you.
Current weight: three sixy two (sorry, my laptop keys are bugging out on me.)
